Back by popular demand………………….  (For part one, see Riding Instructors)

#5

Mr.-I-Can-Do-It-but-I-Can’t-teach-it

I took a clinic years ago with a world renowned horse trainer.

This guy was the best of the best, and anyone who was “anyone” in that discipline took great pride in putting time with him on their resume. He was teaching from a 3 year old who was probably the best trained horse in the state.

He could ask the horse to put his feet anywhere he wanted, to such a degree that he had the horse essentially do the splits…………

and then cross his legs………………………..

all on a loose rein and with a slight shift of his weight.

It was pretty darn cool.

This guy could train horses.

However, training horses and teaching students are not the same thing. Each and every time someone asked a reasonable question he told them if they had been paying attention they would know the answer…………….

I’m sure you can guess how many of us rode with him again……………….

#6

Miss-All-My-Students-Are-On-Crutches

This instructor rarely had any able bodied students. Seems nearly every time she taught a lesson there was……………………………

an unfortunate accident.

All instructors have students fall off occasionally. And if you & your students put enough hours in the saddle, eventually………… something is going to happen.

But this is the person who has no concept of safety

 and no idea how far to push someone or their horse.

The kind of person who sends someone galloping down to the 3′ solid jump when the horse and rider had never safely jumped a 2′ stadium jump.

“Accidents” seem to follow this instructor around.

And that’s no ……………………..accident.

#7
Mr-you-can-only-win-using-my-sponsors-gear

I probably don’t need to say anything else about these instructors.

You have a perfectly nice horse with well fitting equipment, and they insist, “Until you get one of their saddles, bridles, bits, boots, baseball caps, key chains…….. you will never have success.”

It is after all……………. all about the logos, isn’t it?

#8
Miss-never-stops-yelling

These are the coaches that drive me nuts in the warm up. (And if you’ve read my blogs you know how much I LOVE warm up.)

They yell directions………… loudly and incessantly.

And not only do they never shut up, their coaching doesn’t even make sense.

I heard something at a show recently.

Something I’m kind of embarrassed to repeat actually.

OK, OK, If you insist……………..It was something like……………

“Do it again! Make the banana! No a bigger banana! That was an eggplant! More through! More forward! Slow down! No, do the banana!”

Really, I have no idea about any of that………………

The best part was what the other coaches were grumbling quietly about Miss-never-stops-yelling……….

That!  –  I can’t repeat………………..