I hadn’t body clipped a horse in……oh a couple of decades.

Why on earth would you want to have to deal with all of the extra STUFF that comes with body clipping anyhow?………….

Cold ponies……………………………….

And all those blanketing decisions such as whether the stripes will clash with my fairy princess’s markings?…………………..

Or maybe she’s a polka dot kind of girl?……………………………………

Then there are oh-so-expensive clippers…………………………………….

extra blades & maintenance……………………………………………..

It just seemed like too much work.

Then this happened…………….

I haven’t had to scrape mud off a horse in 7 years. We are in the worst drought in history after all. It took me some sleuthing to figure out just WHAT that stuff was all over my pony!

Between the mud and the constant hazing from my instructor I finally decided the shaving of the ponies was going to have to happen………………..

Apparently “Woolly mammoths” are not allowed at the shows….. who knew?!

So the shaving began………………………………………………

And it did NOT go well…………………………….

If I thought the hazing was bad when my horses were WOOLLY………….I had no idea how bad it would become after they were shaved. I was asked several questions about just HOW my horses came to be clipped, but my favorite was, ” Did you CHEW the hair off????!!!!!”

Yep, sure did………………………..

So then I decided there were some very important Rules of Body Clipping and here they are.

Rule #5
Absolutely, no matter what, under any circumstances, should you admit that YOU are the one that shaved the horse like that.

Rule #4
Any and all use of power tools (which most definitely includes shaving shears), should be done during daylight. No matter how wonderful you think those floodlights you have on the barn are…… what you see at night……………..is NOT what they look like during the day.

Rule #3
Under no circumstances, no matter how chapped they are, should you apply lip balm at any time before or during a body clip.

Rule #2
Just as with driving, alcohol or texting must not be involved with shaving hair off of ponies.

and lastly

Rule #1
Do not under any circumstances wear your favorite undies, because you will NEVER ever get all the hair out of them!!