Red Numbers Plus

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I have a favorite Thai restaurant.

The food is fabulous, but the owners & chef being true to their Thailand roots, the food will set you on fire!

I like spicy food. But the first time I ordered my curry “medium hot” I’m sure it ate the lining out of my stomach.

I asked the owners what to do as the mild had zero kick & the medium could put you in the ER. The owners said, “no problem we call American hot Mild Plus.”

This weekend was my first attempt at Red Numbers Plus the 2 star level.

I noticed right away the first row of jumps on cross country were all painted with the color of the level. I thought that was fantastic & poked some fun at all the professionals I know that have gotten a technical elimination by jumping the wrong first fence.

More about that later…….

We started with a dressage test that the fearless leader would probably call “green for the level”. It added some movements we’d never done before & they were……… a bit sticky.

I also learned the disadvantage of a double bridle. It seems when the test goes well the double goes unnoticed. We scored fabulously last time out. But when it doesn’t………

And it didn’t……….

They slaughter you.

OUCH!

Good thing that it’s really about the photos, because his mane & tail braid were spot on. There aren’t too many grooms in the world that can braid a 1.3″ mane. #BadEventGroom #TeganisaWizard

You know it’s rough when you get a text after dressage that says, “Well, you’re not last.”

Fortunately this isn’t a dressage competition & show jumping was next.

The Zebrasaurus is a fabulous show jumper & when we had a rail at the first fence I had a small mental melt down!

“Is he Ok? We can only have 4 rails! We have 12 more jumps! Is he tired from the long trip? Is he sick because it’s colder?! Will I have to pull up?!”

In spite of my small nervous breakdown & burying him at fence 3 he left the rest of them up……including fence 3. #BecausehesaUnicorn

After show jumping we moved up a little higher from the bottom of the pack. Nope not last!

On cross country day I jumped around the 1 star first on SpiderWoman & thanks to great grassy footing & some fancy new feet pour ins…… it was like ice skating!

Even wearing grass studs, when she slid horribly running down the first hill I think we both lost our nerve.

We spent the rest of a very forwardly designed course adding strides EVERYWHERE!

#Pinkissotheycanfindthebody

We did jump all the jumps & true to her super hero self she kept going in spite of awkward jump after awkward jump. She gets the “I am a saint” award. And has definitely earned Wonder Pony-ette status.

I think we were both grateful to have survived & then the panic really set in.

I have to jump a 2 star course next! The Zebrasaurus has pour ins too! We have some crazy turns! He had slipped terribly the day before in show jumping when the mare hadn’t!!!!

WE ARE GOING TO DIE!!!!!

As I was looking for “Olympic Studs”, the fearless leader said, “why don’t you just take out the pour ins?”

What a great idea!!

About that………

45 minutes later, after ruining 1 knife & 2 sets of nippers I’m not sure my farrier & I are still on speaking terms.

But we got them out!

I had some traction, and shortly after we were galloping around our first 2 star as fast as my flapping elbows could get him to run!

#BeLikeKyle

We were making all the strides & I was starting to feel like a NotSoBad Eventer.

As I was galloping up to the last fence, just like I had earlier in the day……. it was starting to dawn on me that I’d really done it……

And that’s when I noticed the jump I was aiming for was the wrong color.

At the last minute I saw my mistake, circled back & jumped the RED NUMBERED last fence.

Bad Eventer is officially a big “bad” 2 star rider.

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